On Hold

Tuesday, October 20th will mark the one year anniversary of TTW. January of 2016 marks the 11((!)) year anniversary of me blogging. I should really be excited.

I’m not.

I’ve debated shutting down this blog — not to mention completely quitting blogging — for a couple of months now. It’s for a confluence of reasons really.

Readership of my blog has plummeted, both when considering this blog in comparison to my old one and just when considering this blog by itself. Since March of this year, my blog has averaged decreasing in visitors by 5% each month with a similar drop in traffic. This is in spite of a slight (3%) growth traffic from random Google search hits over that same time. People just aren’t caring what I have to say anymore.

To be fair, I’m not sure that I have anything to say anymore. I enjoy my job((At times.)), but it is the most emotionally and psychologically draining company I’ve been at since I was in grad school. The current position I’m in amplifies those feelings even more, especially when considering that I’ve gone 18 months as the only person in my department. I haven’t cared to write consistently since the end of February of this year, or cared at all since mid-July.

I write best in silence…sort of. I can be around other people when I write((I always wrote my grad school papers while at Panera at 7 in the morning.)), but they can’t be people I know. Human interaction is a severe distraction for me when writing, regardless of who it’s from. Throw in the fact that I’ve had a grand total of one weekend since the wedding where I’ve had absolutely nothing to do((My wife has had zero such weekends.)) — a fact that is driving me insane — and I just don’t care to write anymore.

I’ve tried using prompt posts to help me think of ideas. They help sometimes. It’s never for long. I’ve tried reaching out to those who were my best writerly muses in the past, but they’ve all become distant, inconsistent at communication, or both. I’ll ask people on Twitter for ideas, but that rarely nets inspiration. I’m constantly stressed and my head feels cloudy. It’s a saddening reality.

You’d think the prospect of my book coming out would keep me motivated, but I haven’t had a meaningful update from my publisher in months. You’d think reading bloggers I love would help, but many of them have either stopped blogging, changed to topics I don’t care to read about, or become so radical on their opinions that it’s hard to take them seriously. You’d think I could find inspiration in the news, but that’s just as depressing, if not more so, than my very cloudy and tired head.

I’ll keep this blog up for a while. After all, I paid for the year of hosting and I’d still like some platform to market my book on when it does release. That said, I may go quiet for a while. It’s all I can really think of to do at this point.

On Hold

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18 thoughts on “On Hold

  1. I think this is totally understandable. My WP is paid for through the end of the year, and I’m not sure if I am going to re-up or not. I haven’t been nearly as active on my blog lately, and I am starting to feel like it’s just not a practical investment. Especially with the baby coming, I wonder how much time/energy/money I can realistically expect to put into blogging when I barely do it now- with much less restraints. You will be missed, but do what’s best for you always!

    1. First and foremost, I didn’t realize you were having a baby. Congratulations. I’ve barely read anyone’s blog recently, so if you posted about it on there, I’m not shocked that I missed it.

      We’ll have to see how things go. I wrote this on Sunday of this week, and if the work week is any indication of how things are going to progress, I could see this being a rather lengthy absence. That said, if there are book updates or if things improve, it could be a very short absence too.

      1. Thanks 🙂 I announced on Twitter a day or two ago, and just posted on the blog I think yesterday. So no worries!

        Sometimes breaks are necessary. You’ve been talking about your workload for a while, so it makes sense that you would need one. My advice, for what it’s worth, is to just do what you actually feel like doing- if it’s a short absence, great, if it’s longer, that’s okay too.

  2. Sometimes taking a break is important. I hate that you have been disheartened about writing lately, but I think we all go through that sometimes. As far as the lack of blog growth, I feel you on that. I really think ever since 20SB closed it has been so much harder to connect with fellow bloggers.

    I’m glad you’re not completely shutting down, though. Hopefully you’ll be able to refuel in some way and get back into the swing of things, but definitely take all the time you need.

    1. I’m hoping that I get reinspired and/or have something to write about soon. I’m renewing my SSL because I’m optimistic that things will work out for the best. I’m just really not sure what to say anymore at times when I write.

  3. Taking a break is important! To be honest, I’ve also been feeling burned out about blogging. I keep thinking about why I do it at all. I enjoy writing, but I feel like the expectations (that I impose on myself at ridiculous levels) are too much to handle. Worrying about stats, SEO, viewership, etc sucks the fun out of writing, :/

    1. It’s been just under a week and I’m honestly not sure how I feel about having chosen to take a break yet. This week has still been super busy at work, though I feel like I’ve caught up on enough stuff that I don’t need to work from home as much in the not too distant future. Furthermore, the lack of traffic to my blog had become quite the source of sadness on my part recently. Hopefully once I start again, whenever that is, I’ll be able to get good traffic and readership here. I really enjoy people reading what I write and interacting with me. That’s a major reason I blog.

  4. Hey, Hamlet is not a radical opinion. Contrary to popular belief, it’s a 400 year old idea.

    …But srsly, you do you. A break isn’t a bad thing. Incorporating photography into the site was a break idea, and largely down to the fact that I wasn’t seeing nearly as many shows as I had done. Now I’m really enjoying using them to talk about ma writingz (and an excuse to show off my photo skillz). My original blogging plan when I started out was about airing performance theories, but I switched to talking about shows because I didn’t…actually…have any theories…

    Maybe a break will help you find things you might enjoy talking about? For me, it helped me think up some rolling ideas that might aid me in cheating the weekly brainstorming process (Round Up and Encore) which, I now realise, benefit the site annnd I enjoy it. You’ll work something out 🙂

    1. I certainly hope that this will allow me to regain my creativeness. Honestly, I’m tempted to just write short stories all the time because I love doing that. That said, I’m a bit hesitant at times because those posts don’t generate traffic or comments like others. Since that was part of what bummed me out about things recently, I don’t know if that’s the best route to go.

      1. Well a) I think it will, but b) if you want to write stories, then you know what the answer is, silly. If your biggest fear is lack of traffic, then maybe test it again as a monthly thing. If the inspiration isn’t there, it can’t be forced, buuut if it makes you happy…

        I think you’ll find the balance – perhaps you wind up refocussing the aim of the blog, what you want to write about, its purpose, who knows. I know I’m not the best example by comparison of traffic, etc, but I only started incorporating photography was because one time, I had a pretty picture, tried out the Daily Post challenge, and got ridiculous coverage out of it. I only do it when I have something that fits, and in no way is it what I want the blog to revolve around, but what it’s done is bring a broader audience to the stuff I prefer doing and have a greater interest in. And by fusing photography with my own inane chatter about artsy stuff, I get the best of both worlds. Or at least that’s what I’m telling myself 🙂

        1. I’m hoping that’s the case. I may try writing one here in the near future if you’d be interested in reading it (one on here that is, not a new chapter on the story series you’ve been reading. Being stuck on that has been disheartening too).

  5. I’ve always admired that you’ve managed to write through thick and thin. When I blog, I leave comments. When I don’t blog, if i have time to read blogs, I don’t comment. I’m not sure why. I think it’s just some kinda lame correlation of feeling like i “have a voice” or want to say something and can be bothered to, for a change. What I’m more worried about is whether you’re happy with life in general and your world at large — not whether you blog or not.

    1. I have to admit, your comment both moved me and made me happier than most comments I’ve ever gotten on my writing. I really appreciate that. There’s a lot I’m frustrated with right now, however some of it starts to be turning around. We’ll see how it goes in the future. I’m also going to try writing something this weekend and see how it goes.

      On an unrelated note, we should start our email exchanges again. They were of great entertainment and inspiration to me.

  6. I know I’ve found it’s hard to keep up with both blogging and reading other blogs. Main readership has dropped off on my blog, and I’m sure that has a lot to do with the posts I’ve had lately. Truth is, I’ve been struggling to find active, interesting content to write about, and often blog just for the sake of blogging. I’d like to change that, but when I do have time, it’s usually spent catching up on other people’s blogs.

    I still love reading all your posts, even if I’m dreadfully behind when I do read them. At the least, I hope if your blogging drops off you’ll continue to update us on your writing. 🙂

    1. I need to catch up on a ton of blogs. Save for a post or two people have sent directly to me in the last couple of days, I don’t think I’ve read anyone’s blog in over a month. That might be part of what I do tomorrow, but today has become a NaNoWriMo day. Even if things drop off here, I will be sure to update people on my book (I do have a minor update, but it’s not enough to share anything about at this point).

  7. I’ve had a really hard time keeping up lately too. My writing itself hasn’t much dropped off, but it’s come out so much more in the form of poems and stories lately that I find it hard to get into “blog mode.” I’m not keeping up well with the blogs I follow either or even with the news–so I don’t feel as informed to write about even the things that DO spark a blogging interest. I’m pretty sure it’s largely about work for me as well, I’m working about 60 hours a week at the moment. Blogging is easier than writing poetry in some ways, but one thing it definitely requires for me is more time. And I simply don’t have it at the moment.

    That said–I love your writing. I love your blog. I really hope you find more motivation to keep it up because your readership–while perhaps frazzled–is still here. <3

    1. Thank you very much. I’m happy to see you comment on my blog, whenever you do, as you’ve always been incredibly supportive to my writing. Hopefully your life will calm down enough soon to where you’ll be able to do the things you want in regards to writing too, whatever those things may be at the time.

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